In order to love people like Jesus did, we need to practice empathy …

Would you really like to love other people just like Jesus loves them?

Really?

That much?

That fully?

Then you’ll need to practice empathy.

Empathy is something in short supply today, which helps explain some of our lack of love toward others. Empathy is hard for the person who just wants to hurtle themselves through life at break-neck speed, not having to stop long enough to consider what others are thinking, or feeling, or actually experiencing.

But when we do put ourselves in a position to come alongside someone and empathize with them, we put ourselves in the best position to be able to love them.

Empathy can look different in varying circumstances, but to have just one example, here’s a story first shared in Today in the Word:

British statesman and financier Cecil Rhodes, whose fortune was used to endow the world-famous Rhodes Scholarships, was a stickler for correct dress, but apparently not at the expense of someone else’s feelings. A young man invited to dine with Rhodes arrived by train and had to go directly to Rhodes’s home in his travel-stained clothes.

Once there he was appalled to find the other guests already assembled, wearing full evening dress. After what seemed a long time Rhodes appeared, in a shabby old blue suit. Later the young man learned that his host had been dressed in evening clothes, but put on the old suit when he heard of his young guest’s dilemma.

We can try to define empathy in various ways, and many have, but one of my favorite definitions is a single line coined by Jess Lair: “Empathy is your pain in my heart.”

That kind of definition for empathy makes sense of this kind of example for empathy …

A little girl was late coming home for supper. Her mother made the expected irate parent’s demand to know where she had been.

The little girl replied that she had stopped to help Janie, whose bicycle was broken in a fall.

“But you don’t know anything about fixing bicycles,” her mother responded.

“I know that,” the girl said. “I just stopped to help her cry” (story source unknown).

That’s how Jesus empathized with us, He felt our painful human experience by living through it as we do:

“So then, since we have a great High Priest who has entered heaven, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to what we believe. This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the same testings we do, yet he did not sin. So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most,” Hebrews 4:14-16.

Just as Jesus empathized with us, and loved us, the way scripture instructs us to interact with people calls for us to be empathetic with others so that can prompt a response of love from us:

“Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep,” Romans 12:15.

“Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ. If you think you are too important to help someone, you are only fooling yourself. You are not that important,” Galatians 6:2-3.

“Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony,” Colossians 3:12-14.

“We know what real love is because Jesus gave up his life for us. So we also ought to give up our lives for our brothers and sisters. If someone has enough money to live well and sees a brother or sister in need but shows no compassion — how can God’s love be in that person?” 1 John 3:16-17.

The power of empathy to foster love for others is captured in Erich Remarque’s book, All Quiet on the Western Front, in the telling of a remarkable encounter between two enemy soldiers during the Second World War. During battle a German soldier took shelter in a crater made by artillery shells. Looking around he saw a wounded man, an enemy soldier. He was dying. The German soldier’s heart went out to him. He gave him water from his canteen and listened as the dying man spoke of his wife and children. The German helped him find his wallet and take out pictures of his family to look at one last time.

Because of one man’s willingness to empathize with another, these two men ceased to be enemies. The German had seen the wounded soldier in a new way. Not as an enemy combatant but as a father, a husband, someone who loves and is loved. Someone just like him.

That’s what empathy does.

Do you practice empathy in your interactions with others? How could learning to better empathize with others help foster a love like Jesus toward others?

Scotty