How to help your kids with back-to-school anxiety …

The end of summer brings with it a familiar scene: backpacks are being prepped for new books, new clothes are hanging in the closet, and a new school year looms on the horizon. But for many children and teens, this time of year can also bring a sense of dread. The anxiety they feel about new teachers, new friends, and new expectations can be overwhelming, often manifesting as headaches, stomachaches, or irritability. As a parent, you have the opportunity to help your child navigate these big feelings with a blend of empathy and practical support.

Start with listening
Back-to-school anxiety looks different for everyone. A younger child might express it through physical symptoms, like frequent stomachaches or a sudden reluctance to leave your side. For teenagers, it might be more subtle, appearing as irritability, changes in their sleep patterns, or pulling away from the family. The most important thing you can do is create a welcome space for them to talk. Instead of dismissing their worries with phrases like, “You’ll be fine,” try reflecting what you hear: “It sounds like you’re nervous about making new friends in your class. That’s a very normal feeling.” This simple act of acknowledgment shows them that their feelings are valid and that you understand what they’re experiencing.

Help them prepare with practical steps
Anxiety is often fueled from the unknown, so creating a sense of predictability can be a helpful tool for your child.

For elementary-age children:
Establish a routine early. A week or two before school starts, begin shifting bedtime and wake-up times to match the school schedule. This can help prevent a sudden shock to their system on the first day.

Do a dry run. If their classroom is known, visit the school and find it together. Walk the route they’ll take from drop-off to their classroom, or drive the path they’ll follow each morning. If the school offers a “meet the teacher” event or back-to-school night, make it a priority to attend. Seeing the classroom and meeting staff in advance can ease uncertainty and help your child feel more comfortable before the first day.

Give them a small anchor. A small, meaningful item in their backpack, like a family photo or a personal note, can serve as a physical reminder of your love and a source of comfort when they feel lonely.

Talk about the positives. Gently guide the conversation toward what they might be excited about. “What are you hoping to learn this year?” or “I wonder what fun stories your new teacher will read to you.”

Avoid over-talking the unknown. As the first day gets closer, it’s natural to want to prepare your child by going over every detail. But too much talk about the “what ifs” can actually fuel anxiety instead of relieving it. Keep your reassurance brief and confident, and help them focus on what they can do today. Remind them that it’s okay to feel nervous, but they won’t feel that way forever.

For teenagers:
Review their schedule. Sit down together and look at their class schedule. Discuss any concerns they have about specific classes or teachers. Helping them feel organized and prepared can reduce academic stress.

Create a shared calendar. Use a whiteboard or a digital calendar to map out homework, projects, and extracurricular activities. This helps them visualize their workload and feel in control.

Pay attention to media and sleep habits. Late-night screen time and irregular sleep are known to heighten anxiety in teens. In the week or two before school starts, begin winding down screen time at least an hour before bed and re-establish a consistent sleep routine. Encourage them to replace scrolling or gaming with something more restful, like reading, listening to music, or quiet conversation. A rested mind is better equipped to manage the stress of transition.

Talk about their social concerns. For many teenagers, the academic schedule is secondary to the stress they feel about peer relationships. They may worry about finding their place, reconnecting with friends, or whether they’ll fit in at all. Let them know it’s normal to feel unsettled socially, especially after a long break. Encourage them to reach out to at least one friend before school starts, even if it’s just a simple text or a quick meetup. Remind them that most of their classmates are dealing with similar uncertainties, even if they’re hiding it well. Above all, be a safe sounding board. Listen more than you advise, and avoid minimizing what feels big to them. Your calm, supportive presence helps them feel less alone as they navigate these insecurities.

Connect them to community. Encourage involvement in a school club, a sports team, or a youth group at church. When teens spend time with others who share their interests, it can help them feel more connected and less overwhelmed by the social pressures of the new school year.

Anchor them in a greater hope
As parents, you have the opportunity to model how to trust in God’s faithfulness, even in the midst of the unknown and change. The start of the school year can be a time to remind your children that God is with them wherever they go. A helpful passage to share is Philippians 4:6-7, which says, “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.” This verse shows them they can give their fears to God and find a peace that is stronger than their worries.

Encourage your child to make prayer a regular part of their day as a way to stay connected to God’s peace, not only when anxiety strikes but throughout their daily routine. This steady habit of prayer helps them carry God’s strength and calm into every moment, whether before heading to school, between classes, or during challenging times. Psalm 29:11 says, “The Lord gives his people strength. The Lord blesses them with peace.” That peace isn’t tied to circumstances and can guard their hearts and minds as they face the ups and downs of the school year.

The back-to-school transition is a time of change for everyone, but your steady presence can be an encouragement for your child. By continuing to listen and support them, you are giving them the confidence they need to face the challenges of the new year.

Scotty